christmas passed

The greatest thing about Christmas is the giving. I gave the best gift to my mom this Christmas, and she even picked it out. I bought her a Bible. No longer the old King James version that has been on that bookshelf for as long as I can remember. It is her own New International Version. I don't think I could have given a better gift to anyone... only a few people will understand the significance of this.

Then there is the "getting" part of Christmas. So I actually made a pretty good haul. Here's the list:

• gloves
• shoes
• scarf
• vintage hat
• vintage Spode dish (working on the hope chest!)
  
• Focus Features box set: Lost in Translation, Pride and Prejudice, Eternal Sunshine, Contsant Gardner
• Beth Moore's Get Out of That Pit
• Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat Pray Love
• Philipa Gregory's The Other Boleyn Girl
• God's Promises book
• some money (going to the Europe Fund)

The best time really was just hanging out with Anni and Steve and my mom. At the risk of sounding like a ten year old, I won't ever outgrow the wonderful joy of reading on the couch with hot cocoa in hand. Nothing beats it.

Now all the fun and games are over. It is time to work and work hard! I have Harry Potter book 7 to finish, a presentation to prepare for RA training, the GRE to study for, and two papers to edit so they are worthy for the conferences in the spring. Grad school really can't come soon enough.

the curse of the tall

I went to my third wedding in one week tonight. Wow! That's a lot of cake. Tonight's was by far the most interesting, but also most beautiful. The Cactus Hotel is such a perfect venue for weddings. The mezzanine, the ballroom, the lighting, the gold! It's really gorgeous, especially when it's all lit up for Christmas. They decorate that tree the same way every year. I really like traditions like that.

I caught the bouquet. Oops.

Fiery Trials

Dear friends, do not be surprised at the firey trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. 1 Peter 4:12

God is teaching me incredible lessons regading growth. I see with undeniable evidence that growth means pruning, and pruning means pain. I confess, I'm actually a coward when it comes to pain. I certainly never pray for it, but it seems to be there everyday and it may even be necessary. Moreso now that I am mourning. I do not anticipate or look forward to it, but it is there. I can do only one thing. I ask God to steady me, since the Bible so clearly states that trials are a part of our lifewalk with him. I am learning more and more about what that means.

In all honesty, I would prefer to escape this testing. To run miles and miles from it; busy myself with trivial tasks to keep away from it. I don't like the pain of emotional trauma, which seems sometimes to be so overwhelming, consumming, and baffling. I don't like the deep cutting pain that goes on without relief. The pain of lonliness frightens me, the pain of losing someone dear to me grieves me.

Nevertheless, I am praying for an open heart. I can't begin to contemplate what firey ordeals God may choose for my testing and growth, but I do long for my yieldness to prove my willingness to be conformed to the image of his Son.